My Horoscope and how I finally reached Immortality

MY IMMORTALITY

I have finally made the grade on the ladder to immortality. Julia Szabo, an astrologer, has included my Horoscope gratuitously and without solicitation, in a respected journal: The September issue of Traditional Home. This magazine’s credentials are impeccable, as they do not tout modernism; hence I have not influenced them unduly.

Because I am a Virgo (August 23 - September 22) I find myself on their short list together with “The blessed Virgin Mary”, Matthew Smyth (a mere mortal) Sir John Soane, British Architect, who went to heaven in 1837, and Elisabeth I (The Virgin Queen). Then the list descends to lesser mortals: Ralph Rapson, G.P. Schafer, Nancy Lancaster, Geoffrey Bradfield (who are they?) and finally little ole me! This revelation has changed my life!

“Precise attention to detail and uncompromising perfectionism are de rigueur!” - I had always prided myself on these traits… Now I am vindicated.

“Purity and refinement are its stock in trade” - I am honored to find this hidden quality in my inner self.

“Ruled by the Earth, Virgos are drawn to the color of nature’s autumnal landscape: midnight blue, spruce green, berry red. In their design schemes, earth tones look out of this world, and basic beige goes glam.” – Well that is a mouthful to digest. Although I’ve always loved naturals, I see that I have to change my thinking on Spruce Green and Berry Red.

“You may tease them for being uptight neatniks – textbook Virgo Prince Albert of Saxe Coburg and Gotha, Queen Victoria’s consort, spearheaded a comprehensive castle cleanup during her reign” – Here I go again, traveling in salubrious company!... But is the soothsayer wrong? I am slap-dash leaving doors and drawers open, prone to stepping out of my clothes at night and leaving them on the floor. However, it is never too late… I promise to live up to my new profile and will reform!

My fortune telling guru ends with this thought: “As surely as cleanliness is next to godliness… this sign’s designs are nothing less than divine.” – This says it all…. See ya in heaven!

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Posted by: Astrology | 08/22/2011 at 03:39 AM