Erica and I are at odds when it comes to telephone communication with our children. She loves to burble, gossip on any subject of the day, innocently rubs salt into open wounds between sibling rivalry and wants more than anything to achieve harmony in her own way.
I choose to be brief, skirt around sore spots and generally try to promote harmony by the strong silent method.
Both of us try to use body-English to move things around. I think the term Body English comes from playing Pinball machines. You actually accomplish nothing, because if you touch the machine, you tilt it and you've lost your score! All you do is go through the body motions: contorting, grimacing and shrugging your shoulders furiously in the hope that the ball will follow your instructions. It doesn't work!
Each child is different. Jessica, our oldest, loves to talk on the phone…she and Erica can carry on nonsensical conversations for hours…often on my cell phone using up precious minutes. Vanessa is brief and to the point, often to the annoyance of both doting parents. Illya can never be reached. His wife Wendy and he just won't answer their phone for fear of waking their small children. You are very lucky to connect by his cell phone, which is often not charged, or in to bottom of his pocket while both hands a smeared with paint from his pallet.
None of our grand daughters, (we have six of them) dress warmly enough, wear hats in the winter, dry their hair after a shower, walk around barefoot instead of wearing snugly slippers. No small wonder they get colds, ear infections, soar throats and tummy flu. Grandma knows best, doesn't exist in the new world of rearing modern children. Mums the word. But Mummy can't stay mum. This can become an irritating conversations ending in an abrupt “Gotta go Mummy…I'm late for an appointment.”
Happy Hew Year from Erica and Vladimir! (Photo taken on Tuckernuck)
Do we learn to keep out mouth's shut?…NEVER! Thus goes the tug-of-war between knowing parents and silly children.
Then there is the “No news is good news” syndrome. Why haven't we heard from the children? There must be something wrong…and Erica's imagination goes rampant. I stay cool and believe in letting sleeping dogs sleep. This of course stirs up an internal feud. “You don't care about your children!”…”You're too wound up in writing your blogs!”…And the retort:
“Let them breath on their own”…”If they want something they'll call”…”Don't dump your worries on me!”
This kind of banter can be unnecessarily divisive and needs a good Martini to simmer down the tempers. And so we carry on in our droll way, staying out of our kid's hair.
We are currently hibernating in our home in Nantucket for Christmas - New Year…First buried in an early snow storm, then blasted by a Nor' Easter that virtually shuts the island down. It's early to bed and late to rise…it's cocktails and dinner with hearty friends who are also weathering the winter storms.….Perhaps the kids will remember where we are and give us a call!